IT'S A LIKE-HATE LIFE

Just when you decided something or have forged your opinion in stone, something changes it. I hate when that happens. I’ve about had it with elementary students because I just don’t see these kids as worth the bother or effort. They’re pigs, they’re rude, they have no manners, and so on. Something falls on the floor, it stays there. They write on the desks. They throw a ball against the wall in the classroom. They can’t be bothered to pay attention. You get the idea. Today in kindergarten I just looked at them as space aliens. They couldn’t even focus on Bingo. I mean games always work, or so I thought. I just try and keep them in the room.

At 4PM the class the kids came in and just talked and talked. I didn’t say anything because I’m paid whether or not I do anything. I didn’t feel like raising my voice to get them to shut up. After about 20 minutes it starts to get quieter as they realize that time is passing and I haven’t said anything. One kid asks me, “teacher, are you angry”? I replied in a not too pleasant voice, “what do you think”? Of course they didn’t understand my answer but I think they got the tone. I still didn’t talk and the kids who were talking were now talking in quiet voices. I didn’t say a thing the whole class. I just sat there and when time was up, I walked out. It’s my new strategy. If they want to learn or try to learn, then I’ll teach. If they don’t want to learn, I’m not going to force them. To hell with them. Not the best attitude, but one that works for me. I’m not the miracle worker.

At 5PM I had the super dumb class. Kelly comes in at the beginning of class and apologizes to me for putting me in that class. She can’t pull me out because I’m part of the package when the kids come to the school so I must do my 1 day in there. I asked their regular teacher what I should do with them. He said to teach them short sentences like, “I am a doctor”. I said, “what for’? “Do they even know what a doctor is”? He said they don’t so I don’t see the point of having them repeat things they don’t know. The cute kid who is 6 (and licked my hand last week) is so damn cute. He’s always chattering and smiling but he has no business being there. I actually learned his name today and I’ll remember it. It’s “Canoo”. That’s an easy one for me. Here’s a pic of young Canoo:


So here’s the thing that throws me. Class ends and Canoo takes off like a bat out of hell from the classroom. The next thing I hear is serious crying so I go out in the hall. It seems young Canoo has fallen head first on the floor and banged his head. I put my arm around him and tell him it will be alright in my job as the great comforter. I walk with him and we get to the front desk where Kelly is. She hands me some candy and says, “give this to him”. She couldn’t have cared less. I look down and there is this boy who’s in the 5PM class and annoys me because he knows nothing and when I ask if he understands he always says, “yes”. He gets this stupid grin on his face like he’s trying to be pleasing but just annoys me. Anyhow this kid I don’t really like for no other reason than he’s an overweight, smiling, know-nothing is trying to comfort Canoo by talking soothingly to him and giving him some chocolate that he’s whipped out of his school bag. I was very impressed with his quick response to Canoo’s distress. It took me quite off guard and halted the big hate I had on for elementary students. He’s still the same moron at 5, but he’s more than that and not totally useless. That’s the problem I have. These are not bad kids. As I’ve written I find them generous and they share with all their classmates. When one of them is in distress, all of them seem concerned and try to comfort the one in distress. They are not just the morons from hell as they have other dimensions that I sometimes forget. I just dislike them as students. I like them outside of the classroom.

It was a long session at school. The highlight was on the bus ride home when one of the students (13 year old girl) wanted me to tell her a word in English that she were trying to describe to me. She were describing “horny”. After I told her she pronounced that the “Japanese were horny”. I’ve heard that too. When I first saw this girl today and asked her how she was, she told me that she “was not too good”. I asked why and she told me that she got a phone call from someone she doesn’t know who said a four-letter word to her. I asked if they had 4-letter words in Korean and she said yes. I asked if they were really 4 letters and she said yes. In class she told me again that she was still bothered by someone calling and telling her to “fuck off”. I told her not to worry about it. Yes, I have an open classroom where anyone can say what they want.

A great game to play with kids who know a bit is the “$25,000 Pyramid”. The kids laugh and get excited and it’s funny to hear them searching their minds for the words in English. I love Miss Kim. She’s the one who grunts. Here she is:


Listening to her give clues and get frustrated is a riot. She always puts a smile on my face. Even Miss Han (the last year of high school student who knows less than the 12 year old in that class) got into the spirit of things. I’ll have to take a class picture of that class. Kids from 12 to 18.

One of the girls I have at 9:30 will be 16 in 2 weeks. That’s really 15 as they start at the age of one when they’re born. She was telling me that her girlfriend got a boyfriend today. I asked how do you get a boyfriend. What transpires is that the boy tells the girl he loves her and then if the girl likes him, they’re boyfriend and girlfriend. I asked what do you do as boyfriend and girlfriend. They go places, he buys her presents, and you eat lunch together at school. I really enjoy these conversations. She then told me that she’s jealous and she wants a boyfriend. She’s had 3 in her life. She said she had her first boyfriend when she was 12. I asked her what she wants in a boyfriend and she told me she wants a foreigner. I asked her why and she said she likes “blond hair, blue eyes, and a high nose”. I have a “high nose”. She said she wanted kids with these features and I told her that it was doubtful she’d have kids that looked like that. I also told her the chances of meeting a 16 year old foreigner were slim. She knew that. I did inquire as to what a “high nose” was. I always thought my nose was where everyone’s was, in fact it’s in the same place as Korean noses are. Apparently a “high nose” means a sharper more defined nose as opposed to a flat, squashed nose like Korean’s have. I told her that didn’t mean my nose was high and she said she knew, it’s just what Korean’s call it. Very interesting.

I had two nice experiences today out in the town of Gwangyang. I was at the bank getting some money and as I’m about to leave a woman says hello to me. She starts talking to me after being sure I wasn’t bothering her. (I love polite people). She was studying English and wanted to talk for a bit for practice. She told me she’s been studying for 8 months with a Canadian teacher. It seems (or so it sounded like to me) that she’s a Catholic, who is going with her family to Rome next year, and this is in preparation for the trip. As I have said many times, I take great pleasure in strangers starting up a small conversation with me.

I went to the pharmacy this afternoon to pick up my medication and I didn’t have enough money with me. They told me to take the meds and to bring in the money on Monday. That’s what small town living is all about. Damn. I slam this town one day for being boring, but on the other hand, it’s friendly. Today when I got in the cab to go to yoga, the driver asked me if I wanted the bus station (that’s where I get out to go to yoga). I love it when they know me.