HELP! I’M TURNING INTO A KOREAN TEACHER

Discipline has entered my classroom. I can’t tell you what a waste of time and energy it is to have to do this but some kids just won’t shut up. I give them the talks on how they need English to go to University and how they will end up as garbage men, but it doesn’t help. I don’t lose my temper but I had to do something.

Some kids I make get up and stand at the back of the class. When that fills up I take the new troublemakers and have them stand at the front. Some I make carry their desks out into the hallway and stand there. Some I have sit on the floor. And sometimes I make the standing students hold a chair up. By the end of the class it looks like some kind of comedy film. I’m laughing because these kids look so damn stupid. I waste so much of my time trying to maintain order. Not only does it bug me because it’s such bad manners on their part, but it hurts the students that want to learn because I’m trying to control the ones with no interest.

I won’t hit and I won’t have the kids lie on the floor. That’s a little too Korean for me. But Min Kyung told me I was turning into a Korean teacher. She was quite surprised I was resorting to any form of punishment. I hate doing it. I want to treat everyone like an adult and I can’t seem to accept that they’re not adults. I guess because I was a truly lucky father with 2 better than well-behaved daughters I’ve always expected the same behavior from all kids. Guess what? My daughters were (and still are) very special children and young ladies. They spoiled me. I like that I don’t look down on kids and give them the benefit of the doubt from the get-go, but I sometimes feel betrayed by them because I treat them fairly and with a smile, and they just keep on jabbering and then saying sorry and then jabbering again. It’s just another conundrum I face.

The principal and vice-principal have been meeting for several days now trying to come up with a new plan for the 2nd semester. Using their superior brains they are doing this alone with no input from the teachers. For those of you that don’t know, the teachers are the ones in the classrooms with the kids. But what do they know?

The principal is a first year principal. The vice principal is a first year vice principal. How did they obtain their lofty ranks? Why, the old fashioned Korean way of course. They were gym teachers. Only in Korea. I have never heard of a principal in North America being a former gym teacher. However in Korea they work off a point system. Teachers earn so many points for different things and when you get enough points, up the food chain you go. Gym teachers have an advantage because they get bonus points for winning athletic competitions which of course is the true measure of what makes a good principal.

The teachers had a meeting the other day to be informed of the “bosses” decision. What was funny was that the principal and vice-principal didn’t attend. They just gave the orders to some underling to pass on. What a place.

The teachers I’ve spoken with aren’t happy but they follow orders like the good little soldiers they are. Now all teachers have to be here by 8AM and there is a rotation to man the library until 7PM. I tell you, they are not happy campers and I can’t say I blame them.

So what changes effect yours truly, Mr. Happy Camper? The first is that they are going to do away with my 8AM rotation. I see each class one day for the first period and they just cycle through them. Since there will be 9 classes soon (or more) they figure that once every 2 weeks is no good so they have a plan.

And what have the geniuses of education come up with? Why, closed circuit broadcast lessons. Put me in front of a camera for 40 minutes each morning blabbering on in English while the students sit in their classroom listening. Never mind that most of the class time is spent by me explaining things and trying to make sure as many students as possible understand because we won’t be able to do that. If a student has a question, that’s just too bad. And 40 minutes is forever. But they want the textbook done so they figure I can teach the textbook from in front of a camera being beamed into the classrooms. It’s idiotic.

On a positive note, I’ve heard we’re getting a new English teacher (Korean) in about 2 weeks. Why is this good for me? Because I won’t have solo classes anymore. I’ll co-teach with a Korean. I’ll lead the class but they’ll be 2 of us to help the kids and I’ll have someone there in case something needs to be said in Korean. This I am quite pleased about. I hope it really happens.

I had my first Korean barbeque last night and I must say, I was impressed. It was barbequed chicken and it was of the mild variety. It was so tasty. What was weird is you don’t get a fork and knife as your eating utensils, but you get 2 forks. I can see me eating more of this now that I’ve finally tasted it.

So what else is new here? If I told you, I’d have to kill you and that wouldn’t be so easy seeing that we’re so far apart. I don’t like teaching these kids so much but I’m working hard to not be bothered by it. I work for morons but I’m trying to ignore that. There was no hot water yesterday or today. I had someone from the school call my apartment complex and there was construction going on. They really need to post those notices in English. I eat cheese and an apple for lunch every day. I don’t’ bother going to the lunch room anymore to see what I don’t like. Now that I have my own room to be in all the time, I fall asleep at will. I usually have 3 classes a day and I’m here for 8 hours. That’s a lot of free time. I have no classes tomorrow because they have their monthly test but I have to be here to pick my nose. The idea of running off to China and working at a university sounds better and better everyday but deep down inside I know I’d just be trading one imperfect position for another.

So the Korean gig plays on.