SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER TO ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE

But before I do that let’s take care of the mundane and partially annoying.

I never had an interview with the high school principal in Bucheon. Why? I don’t know. Kyle says he cancelled because he had to go out and when I asked him if he rescheduled, Kyle told me he didn’t know my schedule. He does. It was a lie. I have no idea what game he is trying to play with me but I don’t particularly like it.

My local doctor now says I don’t have pneumonia but bronchitis. Again. I am feeling a little better so that’s good. It’s been a week of feeling lousy and I’m still not 100%. He sent me to a radiologist for a through chest x-ray and he told me that he thinks I had some kind of lung ailment in my past. That was news to me.

I was so miserable on Wednesday. I was feeling sorry for myself and didn’t want to talk to anyone. I ate alone (as usual) at Friday’s because the one Korean restaurant that looked like it had something I wanted (barbeque chicken) had no tables. So I had dinner with my book. Saeyoon called and I wouldn’t answer the phone. She then called my room a few times and I wouldn’t answer. I did send her a message telling her that I had nothing intelligent to say to anyone and she replied asking me to please answer my phone and talk to her. So I did. It was probably the smartest thing I did all day because we just talked and at the end of the conversation even though I wasn’t feeling exactly happy, I was feeling much better and not so sorry for myself. I’m glad she was persistent.

I was supposed to go twice this week to get my fingerprints done for my criminal check. A person at the employment agency knows a policeman who will help but both times the policeman has been called out. We will try again tomorrow. I hope it comes off because I need them ASAP.

Today was payday and never having been paid on time except when I worked at a public school I wasn’t expecting to be paid. I sent a message to a person at the agency saying, “I get paid today, correct”? I got no reply. However, when I got in tonight and checked my account I was paid. So for the first time ever I was paid by a private company on time. Amazing. And it’s pathetic that it should be amazing.

I survived another week of working with elementary kids. Most of the kids are nice but the ones who are annoying are quite annoying. Yesterday I walked out of class with 10 minutes to go because they were too noisy. I told them that I was leaving and they were staying in the room. I sat outside the room and the one time they opened the door I used my strictest voice to tell them to shut the door and get back inside. When I went back to dismiss them after there were plenty of apologies. But apologies in Korea are meaningless, especially from the students so I just ignore them.

As is quite obvious from my writing sometimes it’s a mystery to me (and others) why I am here in Korea. Yesterday I had 3 wonderful things happen to me (2 small and 1 big) that just filled my heart. It’s important that I remember these things because they just make me feel so good and that I am communicating with people here in this foreign land.

The kids I teach are from the ages of 6 to 10. There is one girl (about 10) who every time she sees me strokes my arm hair and my beard. It makes me feel good that this child feels so comfortable and safe with me that she can do that. I’m touched by this non-verbal communication and that children see me as a good person and one they are at ease with.

Between classes yesterday I was sitting on a bench. Another girl student (also 10) sat beside me, put her arm in mine, and put her head on my shoulder. I can’t adequately describe how good it made me feel. I must have some kind of safe aura I let off. I’m glad that most of the kids pick up on the fact that I like them as people.

The big thing was dinner last night. I went out with my adult students to a Korean restaurant. We had bulgogi (a beef dish) which is delicious. I had a fantastic time. These people all like me and respect me. I find it hard to believe. I’m so flattered that they have made me feel so good and have told stories about their lives to me in a very difficult language for them. Of course as the teacher, I don’t have to pay for anything and I get served first. The older generation has a respect for teachers and even though I don’t consider myself a teacher, I like how they treat me. I like everyone in the class (which is almost impossible to believe) and I can’t explain how good their warmth towards me makes me feel.

This term ends at the end of April and they keep asking me if I’m teaching next semester. I guess I should find out and let them know. I want to do it again as it’s an opportunity to speak English with many Korean adults and discuss things like abortion and euthanasia and so on. These are topics that these people don’t even discuss in Korean but I make them give their opinions in English. My main goal is to just give them some confidence in speaking. I tell them it doesn’t matter that their grammar is bad, they still need to not be afraid and to speak. And if they talk English to a foreigner and the foreigner doesn’t understand them, then it’s the foreigner’s fault because they are not listening well enough. I can understand them so anyone who cares to listen and has the patience should understand them too.

These bits of non-verbal communication I have with kids, and the mutual respect and kindness with my adult students are things I would have never experienced in North America. It’s very lonely here for me at times, sometimes unbearably so. But there are good experiences that enrich me. Of course it’s easier to complain and write about the negative but the positive things that happen to me are extremely satisfying and gratifying.

I have a girlfriend (a little crazy) who I care for and who cares for me. We don’t see each other enough but it’s good to care for someone and know they care for you. I have lots of contact with children which I believe is a good thing. Kids are fun and strange and inhabit some lost planet. That so many of them are willing to try and make me welcome in their world is a thrill. I’ve come in contact with so many good and kind people here (the ones I don’t work for). I’ve had things happen to me that I never would have imagined in a million years. I know some of it is because I’m the white guy. But I like to think that some of it is because people can see that I’m a good person.

Yes, I do feel like Sally Field at the Oscar’s sometimes. “You like me. You really like me”.